This is a poem that really spoke to Bridget of The Happy Quitter. “Yes, ‘The crabby old man’, that’s a poem that hit me hard,” she said. I thought it was well worth posting on here. In my opinion it’s talking about what we all want — respect in our declining years.
(I did a little research to find the origin and author of the poem. See the end for a note about it.)
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Crabby Old Man
What do you see, nurses? . . . . . What do you see?
What are you thinking . . . . . when you’re looking at me?
A crabby old man, . . . . . not very wise,
Uncertain of habit, . . . . . with faraway eyes?
Who dribbles his food . . . . . and makes no reply
When you say in a loud voice . . . . . ‘I do wish you’d try!’
Who seems not to notice . . . . . the things that you do
And forever is losing . . . . . A sock or shoe?
Who, resisting or not, . . . . . lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . . . . . the long day to fill?
Is that what you’re thinking? . . . . . Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse, . . . . . you’re not looking at me.
I’ll tell you who I am, . . . . . as I sit here so still,
As I do your bidding, . . . . . as I eat at your will.
I’m a small child of Ten . . . . . with a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters, . . . . .. who love one another.
A young boy of Sixteen . . . . . with wings on his feet
Dreaming that soon now . . . . . a lover he’ll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty, . . . . . my heart gives a leap
Remembering the vows . . . . . that I promised to keep.
At Twenty-Five, now . . . . . I have young of my own
Who need me to guide, . . . . . and a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty, . . . . . my young now grown fast,
Bound to each other . . . . . with ties that should last.
At Forty, my young sons . . . . . have grown, and are gone,
But my woman’s beside me . .. . . . to see I don’t mourn.
At Fifty, once more, . . . . . babies play ’round my knee,
Again, we know children . . . . . My loved one and me.
Dark days are upon me . . . . . My wife is now dead.
I look at the future . . .. . . I shudder with dread
For my young are all rearing . . . . . young of their own.
And I think of the years . . . . . and the love that I’ve known.
I’m now an old man . . . . . and nature is cruel.
‘Tis jest, to make old age . . . . . look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles; . . .. . . grace and vigor depart.
There is now a stone . . . . . where I once had a heart.
But inside this old carcass . . . . . a young guy still dwells,
And now and again . . . . . my battered heart swells.
I remember the joys, . . . . . I remember the pain.
And I’m loving and living . . . . . life over again.
I think of the years, all too few, . . . . . gone too fast,
And accept the stark fact . . . . . that nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people . . . . . open and see.
Not a crabby old man. Look closer; . . . . . see ME!!
`
* * * * *
Note:
The story about the old man (in some versions described as 100 years old) is a fabrication.
The poem, titled Too Soon Old, was written by Dave Griffith of Fort Worth, Texas. Griffith told TruthOrFiction.com that he wrote the poem more than 20 years ago and that he meant for it to be simple and to the point, from youth through old age in his own personal life, high school football, Marines, marriage, the ravages of his own disabilities.
It was brought to our attention that this poem is an adaptation of “Crabbit Old Woman” by Phyllis McCormack who was a nurse at the Sunnyside Royal Hospital in Hillside, north of Montrose, Scotland.
Someone took the poem from his site, created a false story about it, and started it circulating on the Internet.
Griffith is the author of more than 500 poems, which are posted on his personal website. (TruthorFiction.com)
I remember reading this quite a while ago – the story was that the man who wrote it had died and it was discovered in his things by the nursing home staff who then circulated it as an anonymous poem. Curious now about the original poem it was adapted from…
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Makes you wonder how many things you read on the internet are just outright stolen, doesn’t it?
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Yes, and how much of what we are led to be is ‘urban myth’ and how quickly they infiltrate our information systems nowadays with the internet 🙂
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The “made up story” has helped to have the poem posted every year on a magazine around Christmas time, so that caregivers and nurses won’t forget. I like that.
Well, I am glad that you liked it~!
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I did. Very much. Thanks for sharing it, Bridget!
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You’re welcome~!
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I swear, that crabby old man reminds me of my father.
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I’m assuming you mean the picture? Or was it the poem?
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It was the poem. It was just SO him.
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Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
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I sigh. It’s both good and not so good. The last part is perhaps more of him, than the first. We did not have an amicable relationship. We were always at odds. To an extent less so, after my mother crossed over. He needed me more, and I took care of him the last seven years of his life. The road was always rocky. For that, I cannot say it was a good thing. Yet, as time has widened between his own departure from life and now, I feel more protective of him, and his memory. In that sense, it was a good thing. And that is exactly how our relationship was.
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Parent/child reversals can be so complicated, can’t they…
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This poem is heart wrenching.
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Yes, and we’ll all be there someday, won’t we… We should keep that in mind as we interact with the older generation NOW.
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I’ve seen and read this before…thanks for doing the digging!!!!
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I am surprised I never ran across it before…
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