Taking risks! OML! You’d think to hear me blabber on in this blog that I never do any of that. But actually Drollery and I have taken quite a few risks in our nearly 44 years together.
Just getting married was a risk for us. I came from a strong protestant background, his family was LDS. Neither of us were sure how our parents were going to react when we got engaged. In fact, the day we GOT engaged we went back to my house and my folks and my grandmother were playing cards. So we sat down to play a few hands of Rummy thinking they would notice the ring on my finger. They didn’t. We finally pointed it out. The first words out of my grandmother’s mouth were, “He’s not one of those Mormons, is he???” I thought Drollery was going to turn around and run! 😀 In the end it was his parents who were upset about it. Our family was never really treated the same as the others. Our kids’ school pictures never went on the TV. ‘Nuf said.
For six years we tried to start a family. When I finally did get pregnant, we lost that baby at three months and the doc said not to try for several months. But it was so close to Christmas and I had gifts for my parents that said “Grandma and Grandpa” on them. I wanted so much to give them that first grandchild for Christmas. So it was we decided to risk complications again. On Christmas Eve, before I should even have suspected I was pregnant, I saw the doc, and “lo and behold” we were having a baby! It was nothing short of a miracle.
And a second “baby” risk was our deciding I needed to quit work when I had Bran as we knew by then there’d be no more babies. Suffice it to say we haven’t had a pot to p*ss in since then, but we have never regretted that decision.
We also wanted very much to be a family united in faith, so after much study together, his lordship decided to leave the LDS church and give his life to Jesus. Whether we realized it or not at the time, it turned out to be a risk. I was suddenly receiving hate mail from his family accusing me of luring him away from his faith. But it was the right decision for us.
So into our financially stressed lives we felt called to adopt. Probably our biggest risk of all. That’s how we were blessed with our beautiful daughter Stefanie Kavitha. There were sure times before she got here when we wondered about the risk we were taking. But our family would have been incomplete without her. (See Choosing Adoption)
It was then we decided Drollery needed to go back to school to get his BA in accounting. We knew it was going to be hard. Hard financially, hard on the family time, and even physically hard as he was also working full time. After stumbling around for almost 15 years, he made it just in time to graduate with Stef (high school) and Bran (college).
But probably one of the most risky decisions we’ve made over the years (and we talked about this together before Drollery decided what to do) was for Drollery to tell his boss at the place he’d worked for 20 years that he wouldn’t do something illegal regarding the taxes for the business. The result? Drollery got let got. But we never looked back and never regretted it.
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As I read back through what I’d written here I realized all these risks were risks we undertook together as a couple. Perhaps there truly aren’t any that I took on my own, other than I felt like every job I took was a risk. Perhaps I’ve been lucky? Spoiled? Or just plain not brave enough to find myself in that position. So maybe I can’t really answer this question with the intent she meant.
Well, it’s never too late, I guess. I still have a lot of years left. Maybe a big scary Risk will come along and bite me in the butt! 😀 THEN maybe we’ll see what I’m made of!!!