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blogging101, Creative Writing, Faith and Writing, Family, Journaling, Lent 2016, Memories & Reflections, Quotes, Writing 101, Writing Prompts
Lent Photo-A-Day (February 10 – March 27, 2016)
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Day 38/39 — Sacrifice/Choice
I’ve decided to do these two words together because I find them confusing. I’m not sure I understand the difference.
I’ve made a lot of choices in my life. Choices that I know others have viewed as sacrifices. Not pursuing the career I wanted. Leaving a job I loved to be a full-time mom. Going back to work when the kids were finally in junior high even though I enjoyed being home. And, of course there were millions of other little choices peppered in there day to day. And while I did those things for the sake of our marriage and a family, they were still my CHOICES.
Choices, I think, are about weighing the options and making the best decisions you can with the information you have. SACRIFICES, on the other hand, are about denying yourself something for the sake of someone else, or for the greater good. Something you can’t recover. And I can only think of one time in my life I ever came close to doing something that fit that criteria…
Our 25th wedding anniversary was coming up in April and we had planned a huge party. We were going to renew our wedding vows, and my dad’s band was going to play for a dance. We were so excited. Me in particular because I got to buy a very special dress for the occasion. I’d had my eye on it for awhile and was hopelessly in love with it. (It actually cost more than my wedding dress did and was far more beautiful!)
But in February my dad passed away, and neither Drollery nor I had the heart to go through with the whole thing. So we put it all on hold. On hold till when, we didn’t know.
In the meantime that summer our daughter decided she had outgrown her little-girl bedroom set and was very much wanting a makeover for her room. She especially wanted an entertainment center with shelves and a place for a stereo and TV. Trouble was we were really strapped for cash at the time. She was so disappointed. She had just become a teenager, and you know how teenage angst can be.
Seeing her disappointment was heartbreaking for me. More than anything I wanted her to have that entertainment center. The fact that I thought about what I was going to do for awhile makes it seem like it was a choice, but it felt way more like a sacrifice. I took my dress back. I cried when I left it at the store. I didn’t even get full price for it because I’d misplaced the receipt and it was now on sale. But it was still enough, and a week later when we bought the entertainment center and brought it home, the surprise and joy on Stef’s face made it seem more than worth it.
Do I wish I hadn’t done it? Sometimes. We had no idea when, if ever, we’d try to plan another party. A Silver Wedding Anniversary is a special one that only comes around once. As it turned out, we did plan our celebration — ten years later for our 35th anniversary. HUGE ceremony, reception, and dinner. And I got to buy another dress. But as nice as it was, that dress just couldn’t hold a candle to the one I’d fallen in love with. And I think that’s what makes it feel like it was a sacrifice.
Sacrifice or choice? Don’t know. I’m still confused about these two words. The only thing I know was the look on Stef’s face when we set that entertainment center up in her room was just plain priceless.
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Today, instead of a quote for each of these words, I’m going to leave you one I found that seems to reflect popular culture’s idea of sacrifice and choice. Needless to say, it’s certainly not something I agree with…
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How do you feel about it?
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Picture Credits:
25th Anniversary — www.partiesinabox.co.uk
entertainment center — www.shoppingbliss.com
quote — boardofwisdom.com
Impromptu Promptlings 
First, this was a really well done post.
As I read the ‘new world’ idea on choice vs sacrifice, I thought, how old is this person who said that? Do they have children? Have they ever really loved someone? Yes, I agree, that we should not always put others first, but it is a matter of what the situation is. It’s not so cut and dried. To me, the one who said that sounds like someone who seems to me, would walk all over other people, without a care, and never look back.
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I’m guessing she must be very young. Just a hunch.
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For me it’s simple. There is no success without sacrifice in every aspect of life (love, marriage, jobs, careers, sports) we have to make sacrifices to be successful. Nothing in this world is being served on a silver platter -at least not in my life.
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Interesting comment. Made me wonder, is that truly sacrifice, or is it about compromise?
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I don’t believe in compromises, not really, not even in my marriage. Compromise means nobody gets what they wanted and all parties settled for something they didn’t really have in mind.
I was talking about sacrifices, but not in the religious way, because then it mostly means killing. Athletes train hard – day after day, they sacrifice a lot, because they want to win.
Being the best doesn’t come easy 🙂
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I know what you mean about sacrifices and killing which is exactly why I didn’t approach the word that way. And it really wasn’t what came to my mind when I thought of the word. What actually came to my mind at first was a single mom not having anything for dinner so her kids could eat. But I was trying to find an example in my own life, and I don’t think I’ve experienced the NEED to sacrifice hardly at all. I think I’m pretty spoiled. Now if we lived in another country, I’m sure it would be a different ballgame…
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Nope, I don’t care for that philosophy. Didn’t someone say something like this: “A person wrapped up in himself makes a very small package?” I should look it up. Okay, I did. Ben Franklin is the originator of that quote. Wise man.
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Excellent quote! Thanks for taking the time to look it up, Oneta!
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a sacrifice, for me, is to give up something truly valuable in order to help or support another. i think too often people see sacrifice as anything one does that denies oneself pleasure or brings discomfort. to listen to a friend in need instead of kicking back and watching television is seen as a “Sacrifice,” when in my book it is not. and then we have to ask for what purposes are we helping the other? Feeding a narcissist’s sense of bloated self-worth instead of expanding one’s own soul is not a positive sacrifice. Nor would be to drain one’s bank account in order to feed a family member’s addiction. To deny the self is neither inherently right or wrong, to come to the aid of another is neither inherently right or wrong. There is no cookie cutter approach.
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That’s a well thought out comment. I so agree.
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Hmm. I think you can make a chouce to sacrifice for others. Sometimes that sacrifice or what seemed lije a sacrifice can make you happy. Just thinking…
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I don’t think it’s a thing there’s a pat answer for. I’m sure there would be as many opinions and there are people. If you know what I mean…
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I agree and glad you could understand even with all the spelling mistakes
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What mistakes?
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Sacrifice, when it comes to your Children whatever it is in life you sacrifice for them, for they are your flesh what you created.
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