Tags
A to Z Challenge (2016), Creative Writing, Family, Journaling, Memories, Writing 101, Writing Prompts
I knew it was kind of a NAUGHTY thing to do. My only defense was it was our anniversary and we were broke. I thought and thought about what to do to surprise Drollery and finally came up with what I thought would be a perfect gift. I’d finagled a few bucks here and there from the grocery money over the last few weeks, then sneaked off to buy a certain something.
That Friday evening both the kids were gone to sleep over at friends’ houses. The roast was in the oven and would be done in an hour or so. I had the table set with the good china and candles. A bottle of wine was chilling in the ice bucket. Everything was ready for our 20th anniversary dinner. Now all I had to do was wait for Drollery to get home from work.
We were down to one car again, so Droll had been taking the bus to work and back. The bus he caught home was a late one (which, in April, meant it was still fairly dark when he got off) and there was hardly ever anyone on it. And no one else ever got off at his stop up by the highway. That night it was cold as hell and snowing, but I’d come this far and I wasn’t going to back out now. The only light there was in the Bingham Cyclery parking lot where I always waited, was the street light out by the curb.
At 6:30 I drove the mile up to the highway, parked in the lot, and sat there with the heater going waiting for the bus. Finally I heard the air brakes as it pulled up in front of the store. I could just see the headlights shining through the snow. I jumped out of the car and hurried up to the side of the building praying I wouldn’t fall on my keister in my high heels, and as the bus pulled away and I heard the snow crunch underfoot around the front of the building, I stepped away from the wall and threw my coat open.
Under it was the prettiest negligee I’d been able to afford, a preview of what was to come. With the biggest smile on my face I flashed the best “come hither” look I could muster between chattering teeth —— to a total stranger! (Followed closely by Lord Drollery who just looked dazed and confused.) I froze (pert near literally) in my tracks and just stood there like a bloomin’ idiot. The look on the man’s face was unreadable. I had never seen him before. My guess was he’d gotten off at the wrong stop. He didn’t smile, he didn’t frown. Looking straight ahead, he walked right past me and down the hill to the Smith’s store. (And let me tell you, that didn’t leave me with a lot of self-confidence!)
I didn’t say a word to Drollery. I pulled my coat tight around me and got into the passenger side of the car. Thank God it was still warm! For the life of me I can’t remember what, if anything, he said to me on the way home or how the rest of the evening went. Though I do recall he liked the nightie! (Which I still have, btw.) But whenever my family gets off on the topic of anniversaries, that’s one of the FIRST stories that usually gets pulled out of the family dirt bag! Scandalous!
(And here I bet you thought I was this prim and proper church lady, didn’t you!)
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The Blogging A to Z Challenge — N
Picture Credits:
dinner — www.dailybackgrounds.com
Bingham Cyclery — www.yelp.com
smiley face — play.google.com
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Shannon said:
Hahahaha!!! Belly laughing over here and boy does it feel good 🙂
I had an unfortunate “prop”malfunction one time, with an aerosol whipped cream can, so can relate. LOL
I don’t do sexy well.
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calensariel said:
Had a friend who ended up at her ob’s with an allergic reaction to strawberries. I had the good sense not to laugh when she told me. 😀
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Fimnora Westcaw said:
I’m SO ROTCL!!! right now! That’s hilarious! 😀
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calensariel said:
I made Drollery listen to it before I posted it. He couldn’t believe I was going to make that public! Grin.
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Fimnora Westcaw said:
Even funnier!
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randombitsoftrialanderror said:
Oh my, you had me in stitches! If the story gets brought up when discussing anniversaries, it makes me wonder what story the “stranger” has to tell! Thank you for the much needed laugh.
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calensariel said:
OMW!!! I never thought about that. 😮 Makes me feel kind of freaky!
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Deb said:
That’s too funny! I once ran up behind a fella in a local shopping area I thought was my husband from the back and grabbed his butt..wasn’t him! How embarrassed was I..and the guys wife wasn’t real happy with me either! Mike got a heck of a laugh out of it tho!!
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calensariel said:
Oh, I can imagine that one! I’ve done my sharing of talking to and tugging on people I thought were Drollery. That man has the awfullest habit of walking away and leaving me talkin’ to strangers. But I have YET to grab someone’s butt! LOL I wonder what the guy thought! 😀
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Deb said:
The look on his face was priceless! I wanted the earth to open up and swallow me right then. His wife was ticked and he was trying to explain he didn’t know me and I was trying to apologize and explain, while my husband hid between aisles laughing his head off!
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calensariel said:
LOL Men can be such cowards!
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spiritualdragonfly said:
I read this this morning with my coffee,,,almost snorted it out my nose….just needed to cue in strip tease music!!! 😂😂😂
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calensariel said:
Are you kiddin’? I was scared spitless doing that! Music would have done me in! LOL I really didn’t want to come across like a floozy, though I’m pretty sure that might have been the stranger’s first impression. Hopefully after he thought about it he figured it was a surprise of sorts. Haunted me for a long time!
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spiritualdragonfly said:
You were surprising your hubby..you could floozy it up all you want!!!!! 🙃
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calensariel said:
Was just a wee bit uncharacteristic of me. But it WAS our 20th. This week we celebrate out 44th and I wouldn’t be caught dead doin’ that! LMBO!!!
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loristrawn said:
Hillarious!
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calensariel said:
In my defense, I think it was the first AND last “naughty” thing I ever did! Cured me of THAT flight of fancy once and for all! 😀
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Soul Gifts said:
Hahahahahaha !!!!!!!!!!!! Good for you! You probably made his day – the stranger’s as well 🙂
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calensariel said:
Well, I think the stranger was mortified, to be honest. Of course, so was I! Satin water stains, btw… I had snow-drop water marks all over that thing.
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Soul Gifts said:
Snow drop stains sounds elegant – did they each have a different snow droppy pattern ?!
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calensariel said:
Nope. Just varying sizes of wet spots. I was afraid to wash the thing for the longest time. Finally I just threw it in the washer on delicate with some Woolite and it was fine. I’ve only bought one satin blouse since then.
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janebasilblog said:
ROTFLMBO! I LOVE this example of Sod’s law! It’s set me up for the day 😀
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calensariel said:
Bet you didn’t think I had it in me, did you! 🙂 But it cured me of public displays!
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janebasilblog said:
I was surprised – and impressed. I’ll see you in a different light from now on 🙂
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calensariel said:
Well as long as it’s not a street light, I guess we’re safe.
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