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I’ve been over visiting Uttley’s blog reading a great post on Desire and Urgency and the Blogging Game. At the end of his post he did the usual blog stuff and asked some questions. As I read through them I realized something had changed for me this past year of “digging around in my cave.” So I think I’ll have a go at answering them. Uttley said:

I’ve heard it’s a good idea to end a blog post with questions to readers, in order to provoke meaningful comments. So hey, um… are you very desirous? Or more the content type? What sorts of things do you tend to want? Of all your desires, which is the most urgent?

Now, you all know I’ve joked a lot this past year about having “three” of me livin’ in this head since I’m a Gemini born on the cusp of Taurus. For years I’ve struggled and struggled to keep up with all the late-night chattering and occasional bickering that has gone on between the “three of us.” 😀

One of us is TOTALLY a homebody who has always loved playing house. Pictures on the walls, flower arrangements on the tables, monthly themed cloth table linens… One of us has just always been plum irked and felt martyrish because she never got to do the things she wanted in life. The OTHER one is the one who functioned the most efficiently playing concert goer for Bran, volleyball/basketball spectator for Stef, short order cook for Drollery while he was working full time and going to school, all the while she was holding down two jobs of her own. Sometimes knowing “who was doing what, when” downright made me nuts.

Well the thing I realized as I read Uttley’s questions is that I don’t feel anywhere near as “fragmented” now as I used to. Miss Molly Maid has slowed down to where she doesn’t get embarrassed if the guy comes to fix the furnace and the house looks like a cyclone blew through here. The thwarted, sorrowful victim has made peace with the fact that she’ll never be able to wander all over creation like she wanted to or go back to school to become an English teacher (primarily because she can’t remember diddly squat these days so she’d never pass her exams). And Ellie Efficient just smiles and goes on about her business relatively unhampered by the other “two” these days.

So to answer Utttley’s questions, I don’t think I’m the desirous type when it comes to “winning” things you want. I’m not a very materialistic person at all (much to Drollery’s dismay — he falls into the yuppie category). If I’m desirous of anything, it’s deep connections with the people in my life I love. (The only exception would be that I feel strongly about house maintenance. And after 15 years of Droll going to school, we are WAY behind on that. It’s hurry, hurry now to get ready for him to retire.)

All in all, Uttley, I figure I’m about as content as I’m apt to be. That’s not to say I’m happy all the time. They’re two very different things in my opinion. But this cross stitch that I did years ago that hangs in our entryway kind of says it all for me…