Yesterday’s new prompt for the Sandbox Writing Challenge #72 was on my mind all night. As I thought about my list of issues that keep me from staying in the moment, I realized one important, POSITIVE thing! NONE OF THEM REALLY HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE PAST. Now THAT’S a big deal for me. A year ago that was not the case, which convinces me that my time down there in my heart cave was not wasted. Even IF I didn’t manage to get myself all sorted out, I was able to let go of a lot of regrets from the past that kept me from moving forward. Have I forgotten them? No. But they’re no long paralyzing me and keeping me from getting on with my life.
But I ended up fixating on something Opher said in his comment yesterday. One of the difficulties he listed in living in the moment was dealing with offspring… It didn’t seem to fit with the things that always divide my attention and keep me from being in the here and now. Or did it?
- dealing with kids
- car issues
- medical/insurance issues
- extended family issues
- US/world issues
- faith issues (yep, this truly fits here)
- home repair issues (the TV is going out)
- a depressed hubby
- upcoming trip in September
All of these things manage to rile me up and keep me from staying in the moment where I can slow down, observe and enjoy life. And what do they all have in common? They’re all FEAR based.
I often joke that when I pass to the next life my headstone (I like to think of it as a doorway) is going to say: She was so busy regretting the past and fearing the future that she she never learned to live in the present!
So the answer to this week’s Sandbox prompt,
What kinds of things keep you from living
more fully in the present moment?
is obviously, at its root, fear. And I confess that I haven’t started dealing with that. In fact, I kind of think it’s a “chicken-or-the-egg” thing. Which comes first? Losing the fear so you can relax and enjoy life? Or focusing on relaxing and enjoying life in order to not worry about what may or may not happen?
Got a feeling I’ll be thinking a lot about that as I repeat my mantra for the year, Just Breathe… And I just now stumbled on some good advice from Eckhart Tolle. Going to have to do some serious pondering on what he said!