This week’s challenge is What is holding you back?
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This is actually a pretty easy prompt for me to respond to at the moment. Having an autoimmune disorder makes it difficult to do a LOT of things. (Like walk! When you have MG your feet feel like you’re walking on bubble wrap. It has given me a fear of bouncing! Don’t laugh! I think I look a lot like Tigger when I’m trying to walk across the gym floor at church!!! That sucker’s really springy!)
I keep hoping the symptoms will subside as the neurologist says I COULD go into remission. I can still drive. That doesn’t present a difficulty, but I’ve found it’s still really stressful. So when I get where I’m going, I’m pretty fatigued. That keeps me from going out a lot. Not that way when someone else is driving. But it gets in the way of one of the things I’ve loved most the last five years. That’s being a part of our Care Ministry at church and visiting the older folks and shut-ins. It’s one of those things that is really soul-satisfying for me.
Beyond that, however, and I think one of you said it already, there’s always been not just the fear failure, but the fear of success. I can do a LOT of things. I’m one of those people who has just enough knowledge and know-how to make me dangerous! 😀 But once I’ve accomplished something, sometimes it loses its attraction for me. Plus, I’m an ambivert. So whatever might be holding me back depends very much on where I fall on that spectrum at that moment.
(Can I just say here that being torqued at someone or something REALLY makes me bull-headed and determined???)