My sweet friend E. touched a place so deep in my heart with her words in this poem… I know this feeling only too well…
There really is no one there
the hours pass and I hear birds
cars and trucks on the road
no one speaks to me
my face scrunches ready
to cry. my tear ducts
refuse to cooperate.
Another dry day of dread
and solitude. This from
a woman who likes to
garden alone should be
able to load the washer
without need of an audience
participation in the mundane
minutia that makes time pass.
Impromptu Promptlings 
I don’t feel guilt necessarily. Just a feeling that there should be more. I should feel different, rather than I feel “something” good now. Accepting the present as good is so hard. I always want a better good feeling. I feel like I’m typing in circles. Does that make sense?
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Loneliness is a gnawing pain that corrodes the self-esteem.
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Yes. Because we feel like we’re responsible for our own misery?
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Yes, but if you don’t have a model of healthy self esteem it is hard to know what that is. It is easier to see what is lacking without knowledge of what to do to rebuild self esteem. Being a perfectionist creates a great work ethic, but it ‘s not healthy in the long run.
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